Navigating Parenthood Together

A letter…

To my darling,

As we embrace this incredible journey of parenthood, there are a few insights I'd love to share with you about becoming a mum. This adventure is a beautiful blend of learning, growing, and evolving, and I want us to navigate it hand in hand.

1. The Myth of the Perfect Mother

The path of motherhood might not always match the image we had in our minds. From breastfeeding to soothing the baby, I'm learning each step along the way. Mistakes will happen, and your support and understanding mean the world to me. Let's discuss the expectations we had and how we can redefine them together.

2. Matrescence: Embracing Change

Did you know there's a term for this transformative phase? Matrescence, much like adolescence, brings about profound changes within me – physically, emotionally, and socially. I'm not bouncing back; I'm blossoming into something greater. Just like adolescence, things might feel messy, but we'll find our way through.

3. Understanding "Mum Brain"

Science explains the shifts in my brain and hormones during pregnancy. I might seem more sensitive, but it's because I'm hyper-aware of my surroundings. Sleep deprivation and stress can take a toll, so your understanding and support are invaluable.

4. Navigating Triggers

I want you to understand that there might be moments when I react unexpectedly, and this might be tied to an experience that I can’t always put into words. We all carry a lifetime of memories and experiences from our history and that of past generations. These shape how we perceive and respond to the world around us. Your support means the world to me, as I uncover and process these memories.

5. Shared Responsibility

While my role involves "mothering," domestic duties aren't solely mine. Our partnership extends to all aspects of our family life. Let's redefine our responsibilities, acknowledging each other's contributions both inside and outside the home.

6. Being Seen and Heard

Your problem-solving skills are amazing, and I cherish your different perspective. Yet, there are times when I simply want to be heard and understood. Your attentive listening means the world to me, even if you don't completely grasp the feeling. I'll reach out if I need your advice.

7. Navigating Intimacy

Physical and emotional changes affect intimacy after childbirth. Let's openly discuss these changes and find ways to foster intimacy that align with both our needs. Our conversations can guide us through different seasons of parenthood.

8. External Validation

As I take a break from work and immerse myself in motherhood, external validation becomes scarce. Your acknowledgment of my efforts is deeply meaningful. Let's uplift each other by expressing our appreciation and recognizing the efforts we put in.

9. The Language of Love

Each of us has a unique love language, a way we express and feel love. Understanding these languages can bridge any gaps in communication. Let's explore our love languages and try out the gestures that resonate most with each of us.

10. Nurturing Our Relationship

Our relationship is at the core of our family's foundation. As we adapt to parenthood, let's remember to nurture our bond. Your journey as a father is just as important, and I'm eager to hear your thoughts on this transition. Together, we'll find ways to maintain the essence of "us."

With love, me xx